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Art Showcase Diesel Heart; Rhetorician

Discussion in 'Personal Art Showcase' started by Diesel Hawt, Aug 11, 2016.

Watchers:
This thread is being watched by 2 users.
  1. Diesel Hawt

    Diesel Hawt Euphoric Nihilist Courier

    Local Time:
    11:36 AM


    Approached at random by family in the dead of night.
    Clearly one of those situations where something's not right.
    Look back to see who it is and much to my surprise
    It's my ever-jovial cousin with a certain look in his eyes.
    Hell must have froze over 'cause it's suddenly feeling colder
    Suicidal thoughts; bomb dropped while I feel a hand on my shoulder.
    I've been there before, so it makes sense he came to me.
    If it wasn't for my best friend, I would've ceased to be.
    'You're at the age where you transition from boy to man.
    Not a single person on this planet is every going to understand.
    They aren't you and you aren't them - get that out of your mind.
    Some things need to be said and I've waited in line, now it's my time.

    I'm not here to coddle you. First off; fuck you, dude.
    How do you get off saying this after all the shit you've been through?
    But it's all good with your shoddy ass logic, go 'head; be you
    But I'll be damned if I shed a tear over your funeral's debut.
    Whether you like it or not, your father's fighting with all he has left.
    And here you are talking taking the one thing he's fought for to his last breath.
    Who do you think you are? What's on your mental?
    Don't start crying because I refuse to be gentle or parental.

    I ask you to Forgive me - I got carried away and got heated
    but don't expect pity just because you've been a little mistreated.
    I've been there and I actually committed to it with a noose around my neck!
    So don't sit here and tell me it's different after all the time I've had to reflect.
    Hell's at the end of my road and it's already paved and paid
    because of the mistakes I made and how I choose to behave.
    I'm not an example to follow or look toward for inspiration.
    I just hope this conversation's provided you the motivation.​
     
    Malkier and Synthenix like this.
  2. Diesel Hawt

    Diesel Hawt Euphoric Nihilist Courier

    Local Time:
    11:36 AM
    RED STRING
    A song for @Scarlett

    A picture and a voice was all it took, snaring me like a hook
    My eyes were set on something so pure, full of pristine allure.
    What started as a notice quickly evolved, now my world revolves.
    Around you and I'm neck-deep in emotions but first I must cross an ocean.

    So let's go out and buy each other a promise.
    Commit to this thing called love and to be honest.
    We both know the incline is steep
    But I know you're something to keep
    so

    Let our fingers be adorned by a red thread.
    Let it tangle and intertwine.
    Make me challenge where I dare not tread.
    With you by my side, I'll be fine.
    I'll never have to doubt a thing.
    Because we're connected by a Red String.

    I hope my history won't end with you hurt, hope I can avert.
    From repeating the past with my mistakes, please raise the stakes.
    With you, I'm confident I'll be content, feels like this was meant
    to be the woman I was fated to cherish; I'll never let it perish.

    So let's go out and buy each other a promise.
    Commit to this thing called love and to be honest.
    We both know the incline is steep
    But I know you're something to keep
    so

    Let our fingers be adorned by a red thread.
    Let it tangle and intertwine.
    Make me challenge where I dare not tread.
    With you by my side, I'll be fine.
    I'll never have to doubt a thing.
    Because we're connected by a Red String.

    I will gladly give my soul and pay a hellish toll.
    Just so I can be complete with you as my whole!
    I'll climb out of the abyss just to have one last kiss.
    Because when I'm with you I'm in total bliss!
    (And I want to...)

    Let our fingers be adorned by a red thread.
    Let it tangle and intertwine.
    Make me challenge where I dare not tread.
    With you by my side, I'll be fine.
    I'll never have to doubt a thing.
    Because we're connected by a Red String.

    A red thread that will never sever.
    A Red String, binding us forever.
     
    Malkier, Synthenix and Scarlett like this.
  3. Diesel Hawt

    Diesel Hawt Euphoric Nihilist Courier

    Local Time:
    11:36 AM
    Venus to my Mars
    A song for @Scarlett, inspired by Fly Me to the Moon

    I already know the struggle that I gotta go through
    But you also know a muh'fucker don't want to.
    I'd rather have it all provided on a silver plate
    Ain't it great to dream of simpler days but I wait
    For the opportunities I've set in mind to align
    So I climb this mountain and claim what's rightfully mine.
    It's my time
    To do what I gotta do all for you, baby boo
    So don't think there's a chance I don't ever want this too.
    I've never been so certain of anything in my life
    That you're the only woman I'd dream of being my wife.
    Never imagined it until you walked into the picture
    Now I wonder what size of that white dress can fit ya'.
    I've been humbled by your presenced and gifted by your smile
    So now I can stop all my stressin and run for miles.
    To you where I got a whole new life in store.
    You're all that I ever want to adore.

    Let us fly among the stars
    Be the Venus to my Mars.
    Please, let me love you
    So I can fly us to the moon

    I'm try'n to become a teacher so I can reach ya' and be a feature
    In all your family photographs, children included so we can laugh
    'Bout all the times we cried and worried about how it all ends
    I'd rather stop all that shit and celebrate how it begins.
    You had me at a picture and blessed me with your sound.
    Now I've sacrificed toxic friends I don't needa be around.
    Red strings connect us halfway across the world
    I felt you tuggin' on mine when I saw you girl.
    Lemme proudly say I'm the happiest man on Earth
    And I will be until I'm asleep six feet under dirt
    Waiting for you in the next chapter of our story
    In other words, can I ask you to adore me?
    I've been humbled by your presenced and gifted by your smile
    So now I can stop all my stressin and run for miles.
    To you where I got a whole new life in store.
    You're all that I ever want to adore.

    Let us fly among the stars
    Be the Venus to my Mars.
    We'll fly to the moon
    Please let me love you.
     
  4. Diesel Hawt

    Diesel Hawt Euphoric Nihilist Courier

    Local Time:
    11:36 AM
    WARNING: Controversial Content

    I ain't here to brag bout that bullshit, im here to keep it real
    Don't give two fucks what you think bout it, this is for me to deal
    With the issues I contend with on a regular basis
    So let me slip into my Nikes and tie up the laces
    "here's another white dude tryin' to make it in this game", no
    The color of my skin keep ya'll rude when we chasin' the same, so
    Shoutin' bout white privilege when ya'll don't even know my name, go
    Whine to some other muhfucker that cares, I hustle for my fame, oh!
    I'm at that point in life where I've got nothin' left to lose
    I done grew content with having nothing after all of the abuse
    I suffered through over the years and thinkin' it'll all work out
    feigning for all the finer things with my pocket's in a drought (ah)
    If there's anything I've learned after facin' all my demons
    I'm the cause of it all, so it's 'bout time I get to schemin'
    I've got a vision to pursue so I can stop dreamin'
    bout having something worthwhile in my life that's worth meanin'
    and to all of ya'll that hate my style, you think I really care?
    Im doin' this for me, so stay a while and keep goin' nowhere
    when I break my own ceilings, I'll laugh while ya'll stare
    and bitch 'bout 'the man' keepin ya'll down and how it's not fair
    I've been though a lot in my twenty five years
    but I'm not sure if I'm ready to face my fears
    so I look for excuses while I keep cranking my gears
    and struggle to keep it going while I fight back tears
    I'm told a man isn't ever supposed to cry
    but why? I can't even lie. When I look in my eyes
    all I see is a broken man living post-suicide
    This ain't for attention. I just had to mention.
    That this is my life. But it'll be alright. I'm still gonna fight.
    I just had to clear my mind from the heart
    So I can really feel like it's a restart.
    First, step in my shoes and let's take a walk down memory lane
    When my momma was poppin pills to cope with all of the pain
    she inflicted upon herself in her youth and living in shame
    so she settled for a man that helps smoke up all the Mary Jane
    The type that takes his knuckles to a little child's head
    Using'em to punish them while they're sleeping in the bed
    One day he gets too much and the kid's head is split open
    To the E.R he goes but his mama keep's copin'
    with all the nonsense by drowning in lord knows what
    I'm sure there's plenty of ya'll that say it's horrid, but
    it's a part of what I had to handle while I grew into a man
    So to the others that have had similar, I can understand
    I never became the victim but it comes back to haunt me
    just like that fateful night where I was drugged at a party
    barely cohesive about my surroundings while she's having a blast
    making me swallow a Viagra so I'm able to make the night last
    There's a possibility I've got a child out there under her roof
    and the worst part about the deal is I've got no empirical proof
    except my word, so I decided to keep it locked deep inside
    where all the negativity can safely turn to and hide
     
    owls388 and Meow. like this.
  5. Diesel Hawt

    Diesel Hawt Euphoric Nihilist Courier

    Local Time:
    11:36 AM
    I relax and sit back watching people on TV be blessed
    Makin' it rain money over mansions, cars and stripper's chests
    I confess, it's hard for me not to feel like I'm one word: small.
    Angry at how ya'll made while all I can do is crawl. Fuck ya'll
    for makin' me feel like that's the ideal American Dream
    now that I'm older, I know it's not as pleasant as it seems.
    It's my fault for allowing myself to be misled
    and lettin' opportunities pass by I best leave unsaid.
    'Cause to dwell on it now would be to live in the past.
    I need to keep my mind focused on chasin' all this cash.
    That life of luxury be damned, i've got a family to support.
    They raised me up to a man, so now ya'll pass the torch.
    I'm not gonna let anybody obscure my sight on the goal.
    I'mma ride for my family until I'm paying death's toll.
    I'll grow old before I let my momentum grow cold.
    And that's a guaranteed promise, hold me to it folks.

    Hey now, I'm comin' up
    Hey now, I'm growin' up
    Hey now, I'm loadin' up
    Watch me take over the world one day at a time.
    Hey now, oh yo what's up?
    Hey now, pour Ciroc in my cup
    Hey now, time to double up.
    Watch me take over the world one day at a time.
     
  6. Diesel Hawt

    Diesel Hawt Euphoric Nihilist Courier

    Local Time:
    11:36 AM
    Hear ye! Hear ye! This here is the situation we face!
    An empire toppled, an emperor sitting down in disgrace.
    Knocked off the throne and forced to see the end of his reign.
    Man versus world round 'who knows' and the man is slain yet again.
    Either way I look, it's the same thing.
    Nightmarish visions mixed with empty dreams.
    Nothing's ever as real as it seems.
    So I turn to the pen so I can sing
    about the struggle - the hustle - the bustle - the flexing of a certain muscle
    that provides me confidence that this is a gritty reality
    I'm trapped and I just wanna shout 'why is it always me!?" Let me be free! Please!
    I can't take it! This pain's too deep! So I weep and piss my bedsheets! I can't get this water off my feet!
    I'm a child playing with grown ladies and men! Let me just suckle my mom's teats and avoid all my sin!
    I just wanna say Amen, call it quits and wait for the cold embrace of death: The end.
    Suicidal I'm not, but it gets really hard
    when you're standing in the middle of flames getting charred
    when you're taking a lashing and developing scars
    I'm begging for a reprise, LET ME OUT OF THIS FARCE
     

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